


I'm Burnt Out, I Smell of Smoke

by Ezras_Mused_Writings



Series: Logan you are loved I promise (somehow these all have become songfics, dunno how I ended up here-) [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: AO3 you need to change that, Burnout - Freeform, Caring Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Caring Deceit | Janus Sanders, Depressed Logic | Logan Sanders, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicidal Ideations, Insecure Logic | Logan Sanders, Logan lies at the end to reassure his boyfriends, Logan over works himself a lot, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, Logic | Logan Sanders is Bad at Feelings, Logic | Logan Sanders-centric, M/M, Multi, Self-Harm, Songfic, Unintentional Dehydration, Unintentional Starvation, i'm sorry in advance, logan honey the other core three do care about you, lying, no beta we die like men, so not exactly mentioned but I implied logan is suicidal lol, why is that not an official tag, with the outro lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:26:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27134537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ezras_Mused_Writings/pseuds/Ezras_Mused_Writings
Summary: Logan is sick of being ignored and in order to gain favor from the Sides he overworks himself, causing him to unknowningly crash into burnout.-Fanfic Inspired By: Burned Out by Dodie Clark-
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Series: Logan you are loved I promise (somehow these all have become songfics, dunno how I ended up here-) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1988464
Comments: 13
Kudos: 136





	I'm Burnt Out, I Smell of Smoke

Logan was sick of being neglected by the other sides, sick of being ignored, so he decided to do something about it. But instead of doing something like, you know, actually talking about his feelings, he overworked himself. Deciding that, in order to gain favor as the logical side, and in order to make the others request his input more, he had to work and work with no breaks. It soon spiralled into something unhealthy, doing work for hours to days without food, drink, or sleep. His boyfriends soon got worried for the side and decided to do something about it.  
  
_He was certain, so was I  
There was comfort in her sighs  
__Dreams and ideas should not be the same thing  
__You waited, smiling, for this?_  
  
Janus and Remus rose up into Logan's room to find him basically falling asleep at his desk. The two had never seen him in such a state, as Logan was a stickler for going to sleep on time and getting the right amount of nutrients in order to help Thomas function. The two were taken aback when Logan turned his chair around to show his eyebags and tear tracks. "Logan, our Nebula," Janus' face scrunched up in worry, "are you alright?" Although Janus already knew the answer.  
  
"Huh?" Logan questioned and then straightened his tie and adjusted his glasses, which were only being held up by one ear. "Oh, uh, yes I'm alright."  
  
Remus jumped in with an, "Are you sure about that? Because you look about as wrecked as a drunkard after being kicked out of the bar!"  
  
_Oh she'd want it if she knew  
She could take it, I thought too  
Be careful, be cautious, but you just wished harder  
You waited, smiling, for this?  
  
_Logan explained his state and why he was doing this to himself, "If I just work harder, if I just do my job better, the others will stop ignoring me and will start valuing my input."  
  
"Darling, you can't be doing this to yourself." Janus said, voice comforting but laced with worry for his boyfriend's health. "They don't mean to ignore you, they just aren't, mentally based, they're not logical thinkers, the three others, and even Remus are very much emotionally charged."  
  
_"But they love you"  
Over and over, "They love you"  
Thousands and thousands of eyes just like mine  
Aching to find who they are  
"Oh they love you! Oh you can feel how they love you"  
Coated and warm but that's all they can do  
Words only get through if they're sharp  
  
_"But the others obviously only care about my info when it is directly helpful to them, like explaining Remus isn't as bad as they thought he was." Logan sighs, "But any time I mention something that they think won't be helpful for the topic at hand they ignore me or talk over me or, just pulling from the latest Sides video, slice my text box in half and straight up skip all of my dialogue."  
  
Remus looked at Logan and pouted, "Logie, they really do care about you, they just are sometimes too overly emotional."  
  
"How would you know they actually care about me?"  
  
_Oh how fitting for one so fake  
Make me a fairy, whatever it takes  
And just like her tale, my dream was a scam  
You waited, smiling, for this?  
  
_Janus smiled, "Remus might not exactly know they actually care about you, but as the Deceitful side, I can sense lies, and I can tell that the others aren't lying when they say nice things about you. Even if it may seem that way sometimes."  
  
Logan was suddenly hit with a wave of exhaustion, having previously ignored it before, but also he felt a pain in his stomach and definitely, the more his two partners looked at him, the more dehydration symptoms they saw.  
  
_I am burnt out, I smell of smoke  
It seeps through her cracks and so I start to choke  
Sentences sit in her mouth that are templated  
You waited, smiling, for this?  
  
_The two immediately knew that they needed to summon some food and water, as if they made it themselves, one, the kitchen would end up a disaster and the whole `making Logan stop working` thing would be gone to waste because he'd feel inclined to help. And two, they don't want Logan falling asleep at the dining table. So Janus summoned a glass of water and a small plate of food, not wanting to give him too much but also wanting to make sure he actually eats it.  
  
_"But they love you"_ _  
__Over and over, "They love you"  
__Thousands and thousands of eyes just like mine  
Aching to find who they are  
"Oh they love you! Oh you can feel how they love you"  
Coated and warm but that's all they can do  
Words only get through if they're sharp  
  
_Logan looked at his boyfriends, the three now snuggled up in Logan's bed. Janus running his fingers through Logan's hair which was a knotted mess and Logan murmurred, "Why do you care so much?"  
  
"We care because we love you, Logan. That's what partners do, care almost too much for each other." Janus said, feeling sad at the fact Logan was questioning them over such a simple act of love.  
  
Remus pouted, "Logie, like Janus said, we love you and we care so much because that's what boyfriends do. Even you care so much, although it is in subtler ways."  
  
_Oh maybe I'll talk about it (Maybe I'll talk about it)  
I can just talk about it (I can just talk about it)  
I'll never talk about it (I'll never talk about it)  
No, I cannot talk about it  
  
_"Logan, tell the others about how you feel, how that you feel outcasted by them. I don't want to see you harming yourself to gain their `favor`." Janus said, voice kind of tremoring at the end.  
  
"But how do I tell them?" Logan said quietly, having already made up his mind that he won't tell the others about how he overworked himself. "They already see me as some emotionless robot because that's what I wanted them to believe."  
  
"I mean they really don't Logie, they just know that you don't like talking about your emotions so they never really bring it up." Remus said, "At least that's what I feel from them, that they care about how you feel and about your input but they don't want to bring it up because they don't want you to suddenly close yourself off. Hell you've been in your room for about a week now and the others are trying not to worry too much because they want to give you space but they are also worried about. So much so that Virgil's been on high alert in case you come out of your room." Remus rubbed circles into the small of Logan's back.  
  
_Don't build hope on something broken  
I am not cartoon  
Cry for help, I am not joking  
I might just leave soon  
Don't build hope on something broken  
I am not cartoon  
Carry for help, I am not joking  
I might just leave soon  
  
_"Pinky swear that you'll tell them?" Remus said to Logan.  
  
Logan raises up his hand, shakily, pinky swearing. Although Logan is glad that Janus can only sense lies if they are spoken, because he wanted to reassure Remus and Janus, but he was already set on not telling the others.


End file.
